The next few posts will contain topics encouraging us to have some “Real Talk!” about different issues. I won’t give my personal opinion when I introduce the matter but may do so when I respond to comments. Naturally, everyone’s opinion will be different, so the conversation should be interesting. Please feel comfortable rendering your honest thoughts—no judgment! Hopefully, your comments will be helpful to other readers who may be struggling with what to do in certain situations. Ok, let’s go! This one should be reasonably easy.
“Real Talk!” How do you feel about co-signing for someone who could be a child, other family members, or a friend? Have you ever co-signed for someone? If so, was the result positive or negative? Additionally, if the individual did not keep up their end of the bargain, did it ruin the relationship between you and the other person? Hence, have you needed someone to co-sign for you? Did you get a co-signer? Was it family or a friend? What was the outcome?
Indeed money can affect relationships in many ways. Not co-signing for someone close to you, such as a child or dear relative, could strain the relationship because the person feels let down. On the other hand, you might not be financially able to pick up the pieces if the other person defaults on the agreement. So much to consider. This discussion is some “Real Talk!” you may need to have with someone. Alright, you have enough to ponder. Please share your views and/or experience with this subject matter. Also, please send topics of your choice. Wealth gotten by vanity shall be diminished: but he that gathereth by labour shall increase. Proverbs 13:11. I’ll be back next week with another “Real Talk!” post.
Be encouraged, and God bless!
Sister Jackie
Great topic! Personally, I think that if I chose to co-sign for someone, I would have to know that if they defaulted on it, that I not only could afford to cover the amount without it bankrupting me or harming my credit, and even moreso, that I had made peace with myself before co-signing, that I would not hold it against them if they defaulted. But it is a serious gesture that I surely not only would pray about it first, and not take it nonchalantly. They may have good intentions to pay it properly, but life happens even with the best of intentions. It truly is a chance to take that is full of unknowns and negative possibilities. But in the end, I think that one can only hold themselves accountable for the choices that they make, and they should accept the consequences without malice to another, for the choice that “they” made. My philosophy – When in doubt about such matters, just say no, and don’t do it.
I would rather for someone to have a problem with me for not taking this type of chance than taking it, – and it not only harm me, but it harms or destroys the relationship, – because sometimes others think that you can do this with no concern or loss to you, but you know that you are not in a position to lose “anything”, or otherwise you would just freely “give” it to them with no strings attached! Just my thoughts.
You made so many great points in your comments. What really stood out to me is when you said, “I would rather for someone to have a problem with me for not taking this type of chance than taking it – and it not only harm me, but it harms or destroys the relationship…” There is much to be considered when someone takes a risk like this. Thank you so much for your thoughtful and honest comments. I have never co-signed for anyone and have always made it a policy that I would not because, like you, I would not want to hold it against the person if they defaulted or allowed the outcome to change our relationship. As for my children, they can tell you I never made it an option for them, either. 😊