Well, my sisters, this post is coming from the “men.” I asked several men of all ages and different marital status to give their view of relationships. Other women also helped me get feedback in response to the topic- A man’s view on relationships. I know what mine is, and you know what yours is, but we need to see if men and women are on the same page. I think this information is worth knowing. Why? Because maybe we can understand men a little better. 

I believe men and women may vary in their expectations of relationships, but I also think there are similarities between men’s and women’s opinions. I will list each respondent’s response in no particular order. I do not give names or ages to keep the identifications unknown. As you read, think about these questions: Are any of the views expressed similar to your own? Which opinions differ from your ideas? Based on what you read, do any of the opinions characterize a particular age group? What is your general thought on the responses altogether? Ok, are you ready? Here they are- A Man’s View On Relationships (unedited):

1. What I look for in a relationship is, first, a woman who loves God more than me. She has to be family-oriented, loving, caring, trustworthy, and compassionate. I need my love to be book smart as well as street smarts. I need her to be able to be a strong woman who can fire the storm in any situation we might deal with. She must be a go-getter, meaning she knows how to get things she wants in life. To understand, it’s ok to fall, but I will be there to help her up—someone with goals, morals, ethics, and principles.
2. Be responsible. Stand up to your responsibility. Be responsible for yourself- own up to whatever. Be honest and truthful about things. If a dog could talk, he could say you kicked me too many times in the corner. If we go at something the wrong way, we make a mess. Do all you can and all the effort according to God’s word- No one can come back to say you have a bad attitude or acted unseemingly. It’s got to start with you. Have to be on the same page. We expect the other person to do, but it has to come from us. We either start a fire or put it out!
3. Have to have someone with my mother’s qualities or would move on. I want to meet and see each other’s families.
4.  Has to have some of his mom in the person. He wants a woman with long hair like his mom.
5. Transparency, honesty, communication. The big one, trust. When you get older, this is what you should want.
6. Communication, trust, and compromise. Listening to each other- sometimes it’s best to be silent. Give each other space. Look at things spiritually.
7. Communication and honesty.
8. Great sex.
9. Someone who pretty much had my back and ready to go to war. Not just with me, but with her parents. To show that she was down for me and supported me. Looks really didn’t matter to me. It’s about the character.
10. I was looking for someone who was… physically attractive, intelligent, sense of humor, has a voice (not a pushover), Christian (in practice not just in name), had an understanding or at least respect of my call and vice versa, can get along with my mother, knowing the culture of COGIC was a nice bonus!
11. I need someone smart and compatible. Someone who knows their role. I know ya’ll don’t like to hear that they need to know their role. You have to think about. I have to know my role. Certain things I won’t cross and I know that. Someone who has goals and ambition. Good sex. An open mind and has stability. And morals. Cause I ain’t gone. So she has to have them. Finances will come. We will have to build that together. But, overall a good heart. 
12. My personal view of a relationship would be two individuals willing to accept both strengths and flaws no matter what the situation is. A relationship is a team effort, therefore both individuals will have to communicate as well as listen. Teammates make each other better, have common goals, and will cooperate to achieve the goal. We know that iron sharpens iron, so both individuals must remain strong in order to grow. A relationship is a growing process. Like flowers, in order for growth, there must be dirt. In order for a relationship to develop you will encounter a “dirt patch.” However dirt gives a chance for pls to grow. In conclusion, both individuals must accept, communicate, and grow in order for the relationship to develop stronger 😊 

Well, ladies, this is what a portion of men ( thank you to the men) are saying about relationships. What are your thoughts about their perceptions? I can’t wait to hear from you. As always, feel free to use Anonymous if you choose. And the fruit of righteousness is shown in peace of them that make peace. James 3:18. I’ll be back next week with a new post, “I’ve Made Up My Mind!”

Be encouraged, and God bless!

Sister Jackie